emotionally affected...

Woke up late today... went for breakfast with my good friend... came back room... stumbled upon this video and hence decided to rewatch it on a saturday morning... Eventually the tears just flow uncontrollably...I do not know what has triggered it...or I should say probably I know...
Today there is a long list of tasks which I am supposed to complete.. all by myself alone in my room.. But I might just sleep off... It takes a great strength and determination. I wish I have it today.
Be strong yenny!

yenny

=(

Things have not been going well lately.. It has been a tough hard time for me (probably for him too) in the last few months.. But nothing can be done about it except accepting it and get used to it..I feel stressed noone to talk to, I feel lonely, I feel sad, I shed tears, I tell myself dun jealous of other ppl, dun look at other ppl, I psycho myself dun feel sad, be strong and things will be better.. again and again the cycles continue.. But till when? i do not know, only god knows. I will go to sleep tonight and tomorrow will be another day.. Wanna find a hide-out place tml to spend my day in silence. Long distance relationship with busy schedule is not a bed of roses.

yenny

weekend blues

Has been quite long since i last blogged.. I try to refrain myself from complaining... so whenever i feel stressed, sad and down, I just try to pull myself up again and again and put up a tough front in front of ppl.. but this time I tried but i failed. I need to express it out. Being alone in room during weekend makes things worse. I choose to sleep 16hrs per day. I dun feel happy I feel very stressed I feel terrible I feel I m all alone. 5 more months, the stress is killing me. People around me even my loved ones will just say, you are chronic, find your own way to solve the problem, noone can help u, accept ur condition now, nothing can be changed.

Recently a professor of mine Prof C said , the most stressful exam in his medical life is MBBS even though since then he has been taking lots of postgraduate exams but all those dun really matter.. because without that MBBS, all ur years of hard work & precious time boils down to NOTHING...u will just be a SPM graduate.. On the other hand, even if u fail ur MRCP or Master.. so wat? u are still a DOCTOR, you will still have a stable job and comfortable salary.

I am telling myself repeatedly again and again, practically every morning before i leave to class.. to just study myself, regardless whether how pathetic i m, how lonely i feel, how stressful i feel... I just need to wipe off the tears, remind myself of happy moments in my life.. and move on continue to study... it is definitely easier to say than do. I wish I m cold blooded like I used to be during school time..those time emotions can never affect me.

Sunday night... I wish tml is still a sunday... so that i can rest for one more day.. i still feel extremely tired...

May God hear my sorrow and guide and protect me...

Yenny

final semester...

In lcct now.. waiting to go back to melaka for the commencement of my final semester of MBBS... hopefully I will pass in first attempt itself.. study hard and pray hard yenny! dun ever give up! In these coming few months time, there will definitely be enormous stress but hang on... everything gonna be fine.. just try your best.. believe in prayers, think positively ... ur loved ones will always be there for u... i had a wonderful holiday for the past 1 week... I miss home, pa & mummy, bro, sis and of course my dear... As for now.. I m happy that we already have a rough plan.. and we will together make our dream come true kie dear .. love u sooo much!

yenny

Happy Chinese New Year!

Wishing everyone a wonderful year ahead!!

Shao En & Yenny

"You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have."

Pictures that I come across on a dull saturday...

Serenity...

"Never search your happiness in others, it'll make you feel alone. But search it in yourself, you'll feel happy even if you're alone."

life...

Only two miracles are worth seeing:
The miracle of loving
And
The miracle of forgiving.

~Sri Chinmoy~

The Ship of Life

The ship of life
Across the shore awaits a boat

Though sea's are rough, its still
afloat

Raise the sails, held up by mast
Forget the troubles of distant
past

As wave crash down upon the deck
Steady the boat; not quite a
wreak

Tend the mast, and fix the scrach
light the lantern with one last
match

The storm will end, pull anchor
and rope.

look up to see the stars of hope.

Jessica M. Balcom