Sunday morning...

Early in the morning, junling and I and jj went to xinho for breakfast and shopping for fruits...then came back to room, bathed and gonna continue my med sdl.. Sometimes, i keep thinking...am i overly sensitive..easily get affected..i got sad whenever i feel that ppl who are important in my life get angry with me..treating me coldly..ignoring me.. probably this is not the real situation..probably I have been thinking too much..and there are other reasons behind the coldness..ignorance etc....i keep reassuring myself..i know I wont be wrong...i have confidence in myself and my loved ones... I admit that I am the typical little gal who wants to be coaxed always...I dun wish my loved ones raise their voice to me or treating my coldly..though i know sometimes is all my fault and they did that out of good intention when i do something wrong...yet i just cant help it...i got really upset...wil just drown myself and go to sleep... manytimes I hope I can make myself stronger.. no matter who scolds me, I wont give a damn bout it ..just like how i m immuned to strangers' scolding, they wont be able to affect me.. On the other hand, I dun want that to occur...i dun want to be a feeling-less person..is just too pathetic...even animals have feeling...Probably I become wat i am today because I have a very protective family esp mum & dad who wil never let me get hurt..and now is the time for their little gal to go out and experience the cruelty of life..yet whenever i m unhappy...they are always there for me and told me "dun be scared..dun bother other ppl..nothing wil happen"...Those simple words give me lots of courage..i dun even scared of anyone anymore...i stil remember the first time when i had that wonderful feeling..it was when I was 16..goin for the motorbike licensing examination back home..the instructors keep shouting at me because I am inexperienced..I got upset, embarrased , and feel like dun wanna go for further sessions and dun wanna take bike license anymore...Normally i wil just keep it to myself.. One day, I cant stand it anymore..i told my dad that person is a real idiot keep shouting at me...dad told me dun bother bout him..let him shout..just let it go in 1 ear go out another .. he cant do anything to me...then after the session go home..dun let it affect me...Since then, I dunno where i gain the courage to face those ppl... They just did not be able to affect me anymore..whenever they scold i wil start dreaming..haha...feel so puas!!
Gotta go pick up a fren from bus station then to lunch later...Sunday..weekend gonna ends soon..is just too fast... Lately, I seem to have tremendous swings of emotion...make myself suffer and hurt ppl around me also...I am very sorry ..esp to my dear who has to bear all these... I am angry at u sometimes but... wanna tell u that you still hold the only special position in my heart..Have a safe journey back home..

with love,
yenny